Tips for Strengthening In-Law Relationships

Whether you are a son or a daughter, mom or dad, relationships change quite a bit when after marriage. Here are tips for strengthening the relationships that bind you together as a in-laws and family.

How to be a good mother/father-in-law

• Let your in-law make his/her own decisions without meddling from you.
• As the relationship between your child and his chosen partner deepens, expect that they will want to spend more and more time alone, together.
• Make positive comments about your child’s spouse – both in private and in public.
• See your in-law as an individual. Do not compare him/her to others, and do not become too wrapped up in the stereotype of the “perfect” in-law.
• Make your in-law feel needed.

How to be a good son/daughter-in-law

• Maintain direct contact with your in-laws. Don’t enlist your spouse as an unwilling "go-between."
• Find a comfortable way of addressing your in-laws. Solicit their help in determining what they would like you to call them.
• Try to see your in-laws as individuals separate and apart from the role they play.
• Be real and authentic with your in-laws.
• If you feel jealous about your spouse’s relationship with his/her parents, talk to your spouse, to better understand each other’s feelings.

How to be a good child/spouse

• Encourage your partner and your parents to relate to one another directly. Don’t allow yourself to be put in the middle.
• Compliment your spouse and your parents in front of each other.
• Do not tolerate criticism from either one toward the other.
• Don't make your spouse responsible for the relationship between you and your parents.
• Do not play your spouse against your parents.

Looking for more? Check out this episode of JulieB TV on this topic!